Anyone who knows me knows that I’d melt at the sight of John Mayer. I love the man, love his music, and love the courage he exhibited at 18 to venture off with a guitar and share his voice with the world.
He lives each day with the intention to color outside the lines just as I do. And I have no doubt you hold a similar desire in your heart.
When I was a young wife and still working as a banker, I was questioning a lot in my life. I had a steady income, college degree in hand, was good at what I did, had my parents nearby, and was married to a wonderful man. But something was still missing.
I wanted to write for a living. I wanted to really, truly, massively serve the world. But what could I do to figure out the answer for my life in that moment? For starters…
I was driving home from work, contemplating quitting my job and I was listening to his first CD. Here was a young guy who worked at a gas station, had no interest in following his classmates to college or looking for his life’s answers in text books.
He had just one natural gift to guide him in starting his life: his voice.
And he used it and found his proper place on a stage. You are no different and can do the same with your talents. Has the world seen what you’re capable of?
When you’re trying to figure out your way in the world, Mastin Kipp, CEO/Founder of The Daily Love says, there will be a tremendous questioning phase.
Everyone’s going one way, and yet, you want to go the other way. Are you wrong for wanting to venture down a different path? One that is unlike anything anyone you know has ever gone down? It’s not wrong…it’s mandatory!
John Mayer wondered the same thing and even wrote a song about it called Why Georgia. Mayer asks, “Am I Living It Right?” Click the lyrics below to listen to the actual song. Makes me want to wrap my arms around my muse and have the most sensual of slow dances.
“Everybody’s just a stranger but that’s the danger in going my own way…I guess it’s a price I have to pay, still everything happens for a reason…
Its no reason not to ask myself if I’m living it right.” -John Mayer
We’re all here to have a similar success story, in our own unique way.
What do you want your story to sound like?
In what ways are you contributing to the details of your legend every day?
We all have fears deep inside that want to convince us that we are not enough, but none of it is true.
As Marianne Williamson says, you are powerful beyond measure…All you have to do is believe it and act on it.
If John Mayer feels the need to ask, “Am I living it right?” I’m sure you won’t be any different if you’re contemplating listening to the stirring your soul.
Follow your bliss. Do YOU. Become all you deserve and are meant to BE.Tweet
R.E.M. sings about shiny, happy people holding hands and it’s a song that can stir me to sway back and forth with arms flowing upward, but having everyone put on a happy face and use flowery words when things are tough or uncertain isn’t what gets my ass moving to create change in my world.
I’ve got to dislike something, feel uncomfortable, lost, violated, offended, cheated, unappreciated, held back, all that good stuff in order for me to react. The straight-shooters, the ones who don’t deal well in sugar-coating a situation, who don’t mince words and “ponder on things”, the ones who go after a solution, a goal, a seemingly unrealistic dream with fierce determination are the people who speak to me, and the ones who truly get me.
This is the same breed of “response-able” people that beat writer, Jack Kerouac describes below…
“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes ‘Awww!'” -Jack Kerouac
I’m reminded of one mad friend who gets mistaken for being angry when people first meet him. Funny thing is, if asked how he’s doing by the same people, he’ll say in his deep, slightly intimidating Vin Diesel-like voice, “I’m happy as shit.”
Does it make sense to compare happiness to shit? I’d say, if you choose to be content amidst apparent chaos, that’s a show of strength and wisdom, but don’t confuse it for a person who wears a permanent smile to cover up reality. Face the facts, then take your faith, courage, and will to act and get through the situation or change it altogether.
Sometimes, my husband uses the word “madness” when describing my anger and secretly, I like it because…
Life is madness…especially as a woman and I make every attempt to rebel every day.
I encourage you to do the same! Question your place. Don’t play the game. Want more…less…better, but never whatever. Speak up. Learn when to offer someone love vs. truth (psst…your honest opinion is only appreciated when it is solicited).
Put attention to your desires and all the fear that accompanies them, then…stir the pot, rock some boats, and do something about it. The Convivial Woman is all about seeing some jaws drop, aren’t you?
Speaking of the desire/fear combo, did you know I’m writing a book? The Convivial Woman, a compilation of stories and cheeky wisdom from one sensual, sublimely complex woman to another. Yes, it’s in the making, so stay tuned! And remember…
You are a masterpiece. Live…mad.
For news on The Convivial Woman book project, event news for The Convivial Supper Club (soon to be launching in my new homebase of Austin, Texas baby!), and special offerings, get your name on my one and only convivial list! And you can’t forget to join the convivial party and conversation on Facebook or follow your interests on Twitter too!Tweet
Decision Two: Make time to dream, to work, to write (or whatever your genius is)
There were plenty of strategic decisions which led me to decide on and make the transition from Convivial Society to The Convivial Woman. In today’s blog post, I discuss part dieux in this three-part series…
I’ll say it time and time again…it all starts with a feeling. When it’s something that you need to do, must pay attention to, if you’re not consciously doing it on your own, life will take the initiative for you and send signs, people, and even unexpected circumstances to get your attention to call you to action.
If you aren’t privy to the fact that I’ve been raising little warriors since November 2007, well, there you have it- I’m a mom. For the first year of my son’s lives, I socialized them in playgroups, did storytime and enrolled them in sing along classes, and we all made new connections and went home tired and happy. However, each night, when the moon hung high in the sky and all members of my family were sound asleep, Cheryl- the girl, the writer, the woman, the individual- would come out to play. She was always the hardest one to put to bed. I was playing creator and toiling with this idea of a Convivial Society, writing incognito for just family and close friends and when I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer, I’d surrender to sleep.
“The real secret of creativity is to go back and remember…” -Twyla Tharp
Motivation is a very personal thing and no one had me doing what I was doing at 1 in the morning- benchmarking, reading for inspiration, writing, finding my voice, preparing to build an online presence,and simply exploring new online worlds to assist me in creating my own. I had this need to (more…)Tweet
Rebellion: hindered self-expression expressing itself. I’m thankful for all the rebels. Long live your (r)evolution!
Happy Thanksgiving Day, my friends.
Thank you for the attention and energy you offer me here at Convivial Society. I am humbled and inspired to do more!Tweet
My boyfriend keeps telling me I’ve got to own things. So, first I bought this car. And then he told me I oughta get a house. ‘Why a house?’ ‘Well, you gotta have a place to park the car.’ -Julia Roberts.
OWN YOUR LIFE.
It belongs to you first. Then whoever you wish to share it with & however you want to live it…well, that’s still a choice you own.
Once upon a time, I had a Sacred Sexy session with Lisa Carmen and we decided to embark upon a little something called a “blog challenge” to see if it would encourage us to be more disciplined with our writing. But I soon realized that
Writing to have a presence is not the answer
We came to the understanding that blogging every day for a set number of days wasn’t the lesson to be learned. We found comfort in knowing that it was okay not to fulfill this commitment, because this commitment was not fulfilling us.
Deep down, I felt putting words on the screen just for sake of putting words on the screen didn’t feel right. Gotta love the genius Seth Godin for enlightening me when he said it is my duty to find words for my readers, not readers for my words.
The words I choose must come from a place that is natural, wild, convivial, and sometimes, undisciplined. And I’ll add that the timing can be unpredictable for such results. The way I see it…
It’s better for me to view my commitment to writing as this:
to write when I feel like it, when I am moved to do so, when I am called to pick up the pen, or ecstatic to share something, and compelled to transform emotion to the paper. Simply, do and write what feels right.
Art/Emotion/Communicating/Feeling- all synonymous words when it comes to the art of convivial living, I’d say.
Many times, we get bogged down with keeping commitments that aren’t serving us. We feel the resistance within, yet we ignore it, because it’s what we’ve been conditioned to do- ignore the gift of feeling and go with logic. The body is your guide and won’t steer you wrong.
Artists inspire other artists, no doubt, so here’s my way of letting go of anything that doesn’t bring me joy, doesn’t inspire me to be fully present with my words.
Here’s a great parting statement to bid farewell to my blog challenge, or any commitment that isn’t honoring you. The words of the unforgettable Anais Nin…
“One word I would banish from the dictionary is ‘escape.’ Just banish that and you’ll be fine. Because that word has been misused regarding anybody who wanted to move away from a certain spot and wanted to grow. He was an escapist. You know if you forget that word you will have a much easier time. Also, you’re in the prime, the beginning of your life; you should experiment with everything, try everything…
We have created false dichotomies; we create false ambivalences, and very painful ones sometimes- the feeling that we have to choose. But I think at one point, we finally realize, sometimes subconsciously, whether or not we are really fitted for what we try and if it’s what we want to do.
You have a right to experiment with your life. You will make mistakes. And they are right too. No, I think there was too rigid a pattern. You came out of an education and are supposed to know your vocation. Your vocation is fixed, and maybe ten years later you find you are not a teacher anymore or you’re not a painter anymore. It may happen. It has happened. I mean Gauguin decided at a certain point he wasn’t a banker anymore; he was a painter. And so he walked away from banking.
I think we have a right to change course. But society is the one that keeps demanding that we fit in and not disturb things…“
How do you feel about letting go of commitments that aren’t serving you? Do you always seem to be taking on too much, giving too much (is that really possibly a bad thing?)? What changes can you make right now to put your attention where it needs to be?
Be brave enough to go first,Tweet Tweet