Inspiration

Choice. Experience. Life.

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Everything is our choice…every situation, every person we grant permission to enter and affect our life, is our choice. We choose to be in whatever state of mind we want to be in, and most times, we choose to remain there.

So if it’s a negative or potentially negative experience for you, pay attention to every sign and put a stop to it, leave it, walk away, kill the thoughts you have about it that keep you there, simply change it.

You have the ability and resources to do whatever needs to be done to get to the place you deserve…a state of happiness.

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Begin To Notice

Sooner or later a person begins to notice that everything that happens to him is perfect, relates directly to who he is, had to happen, was meant to happen, plays its little role in fulfilling his destiny.

When he encounters difficulty, it no longer occurs to him to complain- he has learned to expect nothing, has learned that loss and frustration are a part of life, and come at their proper time- instead, he asks himself, why is this happening?…by which he means, what can I learn from this, how will it strengthen me, make me more aware? He lets himself be strengthened, lets himself grow, just as he lets himself relax and enjoy (and grow) when life is gentle to him.

Strengthened by this simple notion, simple awareness, that life is perfect, that all things come at the proper moment and that he is always the perfect person for the situation he finds himself in, a person begins to feel more and more in tune with his inner nature, begins to find it easier and easier to do what he knows is right. All chance events appear to him to be Intended; all intentional actions he clearly perceives as part of the workings of Chance.

Anxiety seldom troubles him; he knows his death will come at its proper moment; he knows his actions are right and therefore whatever comes to pass as a result of them will be what is meant to happen. When he does feel anxiety, he realizes it is because of that thing he’s been meaning to do but hasn’t done, some unfulfilled relationship he’s been aware of, but…he perceives the anxiety as a message that he’ll have to stop hesitating if he wants to stay high…he knows he is out of tune because he lets himself get out of tune; and because he knows he can, he begins to take action.

He enjoys his high life; does not enjoy anxiety; so he stops hesitating and does what he has to do. He does not live in a state of bliss, though perhaps he feels himself moving toward one- or toward something, he doesn’t know what it is but it is the way he has to go, the journey towards it is the only life he enjoys .

It is hard, it is exciting; it is satisfying, lonely, joyous, frustrating, puzzling, enlightening, real; it is his life, that’s all. He accepts it.

Sooner or later a person begins to notice…

-Excerpt from Das Energi by Paul Williams

NOTE: Reread this piece, but replace “a person” with YOUR NAME.
Example: Sooner or later, Cheryl begins to notice that everything that happens to her is perfect…
See the effect it has on your psyche and share your thoughts here.

Be Convivial.

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Awake by Rumi

Whenever you’re feeling restless, instead of worrying about all the sleep you’re missing out on, realize that perhaps you need to be awake to get started on what real dreams are made of – YOUR dreams. Take this time to cultivate your passion…and if you don’t quite know what it is yet, simply trust in the power of the morning breeze and the answer will come to you.

Poetry by Rumi:

Awake

The Breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
Don’t go back to sleep.
You must ask for what you really want.
Don’t go back to sleep.
People are going back and forth across the doorsill
Where the two worlds touch.
The door is round and open.
Don’t go back to sleep.

Trust…

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Claim Your Life

“You need only claim the events of your life to make yourself yours.” – Florida Scott-Maxwell

We alter our lives by the opinions we hold of them. If we see ourselves as daring, we will dare. We can change our lives by changing our perceptions. We can identify those plots and patterns we wish to alter. While it is important to have the faculty of self-scrutiny, it is equally important to have the gift of self-appreciation. We can identify and cherish those character traits which are our strengths. I acknowledge and appreciate my own accomplishments and talents. I note when I do well and applaud myself for my merits. Such self-appraisal is not mere narcissism. It is the bedrock of solid self-worth.

I become the person I choose to be.

-Julia Cameron

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Get Up. Get Out.

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Life…An Every Day Celebration

One of many songs I can relate to and one that inspires me to be true to who I am.
It depicts a convivial spirit and strength to live by…

ONE TRICK PONY - Nelly Furtado

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20 Ways to Boost Your Confidence

While going through my dusty digital attic of email files, I rediscovered this:

BE TRUE TO YOURSELF
20 Ways to Boost Your Confidence

CONFIDENCE … It is sexy, attractive, and alluring to both men and women!

How a person carries and presents himself or herself is a time-tested aphrodisiac. It’s also a quality that both sexes eagerly look for in a long-term partner. Confidence reflects self-acceptance and self-love.

TRUETM Advisory Board member Dr. Ilona Jerabek presents the following tips for building and keeping a high self-esteem. Take these to heart and improve your personal and love life today!

1. Spend some time getting to know yourself.
Use your Advice for Me report from your TRUE Compatibility Test to do some thinking about what makes you “you.” This doesn’t necessarily mean hours of reflection (although some of that is good as well). You can also learn a lot more about who you are by getting out in the world and doing things. Meet people, take up hobbies, volunteer – you’ll discover much about the world and reinforce your own sense of self at the same time. Get involved in your life!

2. Act.
When you’re feeling insecure or doubting your abilities, don’t hide away. Take a deep breath, get out there, and do the very things you’re unsure about … even if you have to start small. If, for example, you want to act in a play, but you’re not sure you can do it, why not sign up for a very small part? You’ll build your confidence.

3. Conquer fear: take risks.
Sometimes life requires a small “leap of faith.” You’ll feel good that you took some risks, even if they don’t always work out as well as you hope. At least you can say you tried!

4. Stand up for yourself.
Low self-esteem often leads to lack of assertiveness; and when we don’t voice what we want and need, we end up feeling worse about who we are. Build your assertiveness skills, and it will get easier in time.

5. Set personal goals.
Decide where you’d like to go, and make a reasonable, yet challenging, plan to get there. Set deadlines and a system of rewards to keep you going. (A goal, by the way, doesn’t have to be a huge life decision, like “become a doctor”. It can be anything you want to have in your life, like “Make one new friend” or “Learn to make jam.”)

6. Learn from – but let go of – mistakes.
Absolutely everyone, no matter how perfect they may seem, messes up from time to time. This is how we learn – like the process of learning to walk as children. If we don’t stumble, we don’t learn how to keep our balance. Keep this in mind as you venture out into the world. Be gentle with yourself.

7. Do things on your own – don’t rely on others to make you feel good.
One potential trap of a shaky self-esteem is dependency on others. The real truth is, if you feel a void inside, no one can fill it but you. While healthy relationships are important for happiness, more important is the relationship we have with ourselves.

8. Don’t compare yourself to others.
You may look at someone and think they have something you don’t, but the fact is they may be looking at you and thinking the very same thing. Someone may be better than you are at tennis, for example, but you can tell a much better joke. Judge yourself by your own standards, for you are unique!

9. Associate with people who affirm who you are.
Do you have toxic relationships with people who criticize you or make you feel small? Take a good look at the people you surround yourself with and how they affect your self-esteem.

10. Learn to say “no.”
You will be surprised how much simpler it is than you think. When you really can’t or don’t want to do something, say so. (In, of course, a polite and non-aggressive manner.)

11. Practice truthfulness.
Avoid white lies. We often fib because we think we are sparing feelings or making things easier, but dishonesty only ends up making us feel bad about ourselves. Don’t present a false face.

12. Practice positive affirmations.
Write down 5 or 10 things you really like about yourself. And next time a negative thought pops into your mind, replace it with something positive.

13. Find things you enjoy.
Whether it’s sewing, drawing, swimming or karate, hobbies are a big self-esteem booster. Even if we are not experts, doing something for the pleasure and challenge builds our sense of who we are.

14. Use visualization techniques.
If you’re anxious or doubtful about your ability to do something (ask your boss for a raise or compete in a marathon, for example), practice visualizing that moment in detail. Imagine yourself pulling it off smoothly. It’ll lower your fear and boost your confidence.

15. Enhance your ability to cope with stress.
It’s not so easy to believe in yourself if you’re stressed out. Develop a repertoire of strategies for calming your spirit and incorporate them into your life as much as possible (like reading a good book, talking to friends, riding a horse or taking a bubble bath).

16. Shun perfectionism.
Interestingly, there is a high correlation between perfectionism and low self-esteem. The more you strive to be perfect, the more frustrated you become when you realize it’s impossible! Be aware of any perfectionist tendencies you have and keep them in check.

17. Make a list of your accomplishments.
Include anything that made you feel good about yourself, without thinking about whether it is technically an “accomplishment” or not. (Your ability to relate to children, your chess talent, the amazing cookies you make, the great short story you wrote.) Refer to it whenever you need a boost.

18. Live in the moment.
The more time you spend dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, the more of the present you are wasting. Life is NOW, and you should get out there and embrace it.

19. Do things for others.
It’s easy to get wrapped up in your own little world and forget that there are people out there who are in need. Give to others (your time, company, whatever you have to share) and you’ll find yourself feeling better about yourself.

20. Take care of yourself physically.
Eat well, get enough sleep, kick nasty habits and get some exercise. Treat your body like it deserves to be treated!

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“What you don’t have, you don’t need it now; what you don’t know, you can feel somehow.” -U2

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Make Way for Simplicity

I aspire to be surrounded by clean spaces, order, happy colors and people. I want to look around me and go “Ahh…” not “Ugh.”

So I work at it day by day, because I know the effect of clearing my space will only affect me in ways of making room for better people, experiences, and things to ensure that I am honoring my space and therefore myself.

Out of clutter, find simplicity. – Einstein

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Go Within

When things get busy, mentally crowded or loud around you, take that time to reflect and make sure you are taking care of you and then all that’s pending on your to-do list. Staying busy is not productive; it’s noisy. Get away from it all even if you don’t physically leave your space. The mind is your transporter. When you don’t see or hear from me on occasion, you’ll know I’m off tempting the muse…

Maybe we can meet there sometime…it’s a pretty peaceful and convivial place.

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