Embracing My Inner Girl
I have rebelled against being a girl. Yes, ME. I’ve rejected my tears, held back my emotions, my sorrow, my uncertainty, even my excitement, all for fear of appearing weak or too girly. I’ve tried to avoid conflict, tried being nice girl with mean girls, made every attempt to keep me together during the most troubling of times. And for what reason? Because someone told me to do so? Someone being society, family, culture. Thoughts and behaviors passed on from dear mother and other influences have had their initial effect on my potential to break norms and cross barriers, but thankfully I love myself enough to put a stop to the limitations and be true to me, finally. My southern-raised-conservative-thinking-fist-swinging-mama had a good grip on my thoughts and controlled a lot of the actions I took early in life, but in retrospect, I don’t regret being a good daughter. I’m a woman with a huge will to live and my mother gave me the attitude and temperament needed to cause a revolution. For the most part, I was playing a role for my family, for society, for love, but ultimately, I’m feisty and violently happy and ready to be me. I have no qualms about speaking up in defense of my dreams, personal space, body, privacy and beliefs when they are attempted to be denied, discouraged, disregarded or disrespected. Up to this point, I’ve been encouraged to hold back my nature, keep my mouth shut, avoid rocking myriad boats, to avoid being authentic and living for me. It’s crazy to know what your power is and be conditioned to tame it or hide it altogether. I’m fully capable of capsizing some boats and thanks to a recent TED talk by creator of The Vagina Monologues, Eve Ensler , I may be cured of my willingness to hold back that emotional creature within me. I’m going to give this idea of embracing my inner girl a go, let her run rampant, and won’t worry about whether her behavior is lady-like or not. She deserves to be heard, to be seen, to be known…dammit, let the girl just be! I hope the video helps to re-ignite the female flame that burns deep within your emotional center. Embrace your inner girl and give her the dance floor AND spotlight she deserves.