Spirituality & Life

In Every Stone Sleeps a Crystal



21.5.800: An Experience For Writers Who Want to Move

Thanks to Bindu Wiles, my newest challenge and personal commitment began on June 8th. For 21 days, I’ll be in spirit with Bindu and numerous other well-intentioned people from around the world doing 5 days of yoga a week and 800 words of writing per day. Along with the goal to condition my body and mind, I’ll use this project as another opportunity to share how it serves me spiritually. Namaste!


Time to be found

We have choices on how to spend our time every day. We can choose to get bogged down with to-do lists and errands that don’t matter, get sucked into myriad newsfeeds and headlines of the day, answer and return every phone call, every email, or we can choose to stop and get lost in the hopes of finding ourselves. Getting lost opens up space in your mind and helps you find calm in the midst of chaos (read: peace). It quiets the noise, clears confusion, decreases fear, anxiety, depression, anger, what say you have you. Where there is space, there is flow and there lies the key to happiness. In my book, getting lost is synonymous with getting to know…you, that is. It’s returning to innocence, making a comeback, or perhaps, finding out for the first time that you are your first love and always the best company to keep. What you offer yourself, you offer the world.

Every act is a creative one. Time…it does the spirit good. Creating the space and time to nourish the woman in you is crucial and a way to practice self-love. Immersing ourselves in the activities we once were and are still attracted to is therapeutic and spiritually soothing. Not putting yourself first sacrifices your well-being and causes you to end up…(fill in your own consequence). For this reason, I took myself out of the virtual mix for one week and headed for my own private Idaho to concentrate on reading. I declared myself on a Convivial Reading Sabbatical, went AWOL on Facebook and Twitter, forbid myself any virtual communication, and didn’t think about writing. It felt great to not be connected to anything or anyone other than myself. This was my personal attempt to do that which can be so hard to do nowadays- be truly present and focused.

Throughout the week, I mostly read Danielle LaPorte’s newest piece of lit candy, The Firestarter Sessions which caused me to take a stroll through my mind’s labyrinth and stop to smell a few roses growing in the garden of my ever blossoming soul. I got some great business advice, gained new knowledge, met fascinating people, and enjoyed the expansion and transition from one aha moment to another. A few more convivial moments:

:: Discovering Imogen Heap as my new girl crush. Love her hair and genius for making music. No really, she makes every sound.

:: Enjoying the sweet rhythms that blasted into my ear via Bose headphones while my eyes sped across line after line of each article, blog post, and book chapter I devoured.

:: Admiring Beardey Man and his beat boxing example of how no talent is ever wasted. The man can make a girl laugh oh so hard!

:: Making the most of short periods of quiet time to embrace new ideas and think straight again. I’m a mother of two boys, ya know!

:: Keeping a solid commitment to myself because like writing, wearing black velvet blazers in the eighth grade, carrying the same bookbag all four years of high school, and serving as the primary caretaker for my children…it was my choice to do so.

So, there you have it- when a convivial woman is brave enough to put herself first, its because she knows the guaranteed effect is positively contagious and beneficial to all those in her life. Give yourself the oxygen mask FIRST, then your loved ones, and be witness to the joy of living that follows.


Perfection is Possible

I have been convinced of a truth: Perfection is possible. I know it exists and can be reached, because I just experienced it. I am now more certain of its power, its potential to grab a hold of my heart, even if for a moment, and take me for an unforgettable ride. With this experience, I was transported to the muse’s doorstep and given a taste of the sweet sensations she brings. Before anything can get in the way of this feeling, I must declare it mine. Just as I do with my own life, I am holding it dear to me, embracing it with eyes wide shut and heart wide open. I am thankful, because I know it cannot stay. This moment will pass in exchange for another. It’ll call me, then evade me and I’ll chase it and find it again in some other form, but for now, it’s here…caressing, inspiring and causing feelings in me that I can’t explain. Does this make any sense to you? If the answer is no, then my answer is, GOOD. Mysterious ways…perfection works.

How did I arrive at this final destination? It happened without attempt, without logic or strategy, and had no clear direction- just as love is, as life is– but once I was aware of what I could do to steer perfection my way, the intention was all there. I didn’t seek it out, didn’t pursue it and like the sun rises and sets, it made its appearance. When the journey to this treasured spot began, I was unsure of how or what the experience would be. If I’d allowed my thoughts to take the stage, I would’ve hindered perfection’s debut. So I let go of all thought and chose not to speak. I closed my eyes and envisioned a deep, dark, gentle space within me and took my thoughts there. And left them there. I went with the flow. I let all worries walk out on me. I breathed in and then out, continuing this pace as needed and soon felt myself relaxing. When I felt the potential for thoughts to take the forefront, I pushed back and closed the red curtain on them. This was my stage.

In the beginning, there was a little uncertainty, some restraint, even friction at times. As is every new experience, every new meeting of the minds, of the hearts. But I had faith. And trust. And most of all, desire. I allowed the experience to unfold on its own, giving it the space, time and energy it required of me. I inched forward, then held back, leaped across and over, then surrendered again, not pushing or forcing anything. Cause and effect, baby. I trusted myself and all that was out of my control. Eventually, the pathway that called to me opened up for me and as I journeyed forward, I felt a rush of happiness, peace, and total calm. But the journey wasn’t over yet. I worked hard and was diligent in my efforts, strategic and patient for an outcome that would result in my ultimate favor. Then…it happened. I had arrived, reached success, reconciled my ideal of perfection to one of reality and was left in a state of pure gratitude. Perfection had surprised me, completely conquered my mind and body by simply proving her existence. I was in awe of her power and felt harmony and unity and peace and love. I was speechless. Tears replaced potential words.

What moments of perfection have gone down in the history of your heart? When all is right, smooth sailing, flowing, smiling down on you; when you feel impenetrable, subject to no limits, seemingly (or literally) floating above ground, and you can’t contain yourself, these feelings are what we aspire to achieve every day in life. Perfection is possible and a reachable state of mind, although not a permanent possibility considering the daily distractions that swallow up our mind’s potential power, but it is there, waiting for us to dedicate the time, resources, energy, and belief that it can be experienced. Give yourself the chance to discover and set foot on utopia. Repeatedly. It’s an incomprehensible and convivial place to be. Even if for just one moment.


I write to empty my mind and to fill my heart. Writing is easy: just stare at the screen of your computer until a tear drops on your keyboard. -Paulo Coehlo


The Source of Feeling

I have a feeling about a conversation I had today about God. It was passionate, but I succeeded in taming the flames of this incessantly burning lake of fire by bringing marijuana into the mix which caused quite a bit of laughter. Mary Jane and her gang weren’t there literally! Their presence was just an idea…

In discussing the Divine and staying open and respectful of each person’s unique interpretation of it, just as our own lives and personal experiences are, I talked about Moses and the burning bush. I said to my friend, “You see, when hearing the story about God speaking to Moses as a burning bush, that’s what you see,” and I pointed to a shrub that happened to be nearby, “but perhaps someone else hearing the same story may imagine that Moses himself may have been burning some bush,” and I gestured to my mouth as if smoking a little somethin’ somethin’. Bursts of laughter followed and I continued, “How are we to know if ‘bush’ was or wasn’t a term used for such things back then?” My intention was not meant to mock or cause confusion-there’s already enough of that- but instead to make light of a touchy subject and make the point that God is…formless, ever expanding, open to myriad interpretation, and therefore having respect and consideration for another person’s way of viewing the world is important to learn from one another and truly grow in wisdom.

In the midst of this ensuing debate, I posed the question, “Should God be an argument?” Is it a good idea for the words God and Argument to share the same space, the same sentence? It’s a paradox, an oxymoron. Slice that last word in half and what do you get? Yes, it’s moronic. Should you argue with others about God? Love thy neighbor, baby. Should you argue with yourself? Love thy God, -dess. Sounds just as crazy as talking to oneself. And answering oneself. But we’re constantly in search of answers. Hmm…makes me wonder about the intimate activity and art of writing. Call me crazy. I’m a writer.

Do you want to be taken seriously? Then get past doubting yourself by questioning everything and consciously choosing your own path. Be true to you. Be the source, the solution, the resolution to all your fruitless searches. Help yourself, but avoid confusing this for being the end-all-know-it-all. We need help in this life. You. Me. We. And being grateful and kind are key. When a feeling comes to you, go to the source of it and trust what it’s telling you. Stand firm in your own beliefs, but avoid finding offense with someone when your truth is not theirs (as in they don’t see or hear what you see or hear) and don’t worry if their “truth” doesn’t speak to you either. Find your path and walk it. In the words of Nietzsche, “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”

Have faith in what is true for you, and if your way of hearing it is different from the masses, perhaps not even ringing from the pulpits of a church, it’s okay. If you’re eager, open, and willing to listen to what The Source of all Creation has planned for your ear (read: your life), then get ready for greatness! Be ready to receive the message, watch for the sign, wait for the teacher…whichever channel is meant for you will flow through to you. The resources are there, but you must be resourceful and reach up and out and all around to find what’s looking after you, looking for you. Wisdom to love and live in peace with oneself is the ultimate feat.


What’s the Occasion?

Last night, I made a Ricotta Orange Pound Cake with Strawberries courtesy of the recipe by Food Network star, Giada De Laurentiis. Eager to share this experience, I decided to invite my parents over to enjoy cake and ice cream with my family. Sounds like a party! Indeed, it was. So, what was the occasion? Life. Plain and simple, I had a craving for something sweet, had all the tools and ingredients to create it, along with the best of intentions and love, so I didn’t hesitate to get my hands a little dirty. I took my time, followed instructions, and had faith that my efforts would pay off. And they did! Something as basic as my desire to bake turned into a deeper desire to “break bread” with the people I love. Now, that is an occasion to live for and the very essence of convivial living. It’s merry-making, having a fondness of feasting, drinking, and good company. That was my intention, and therefore my experience last night with the two people who gave me life, as well as the man and two sons who I love and with whom I share every bit of my world. Life is meant to be a convivial occasion, so the next time you think you need a specific reason to have a good time, think again. The occasion is your life and everyone in it. That’s reason enough to put on your convivial party dress (or apron) and get convivial with it!


On Being Completely Transparent

While online this morning, I went to click out of a window my hubby had open and saw he’d been listening to yet another TED Talk. I didn’t catch the speaker’s name, but in that brief moment, I heard him say, “Be completely transparent…” I turned off the laptop and walked away hearing that line echo in my ear. I’ve since been contemplating it and what has come to mind is what Dr. Wayne Dyer once said, “We’re spiritual beings having a human experience.” I hear various truths floating around in my head that tell me I am already transparent, but have simply lost my way. I’ve followed one too many humans, have learned and lived their worldly ways, acquired their carnal thinking and eating patterns, and have taken a detour from my original, light-weight, naturally, transparent self. I’ve allowed negative thought patterns and experiences to weigh my spirit down, causing me to have a heavy heart and act out of nature. I am only reminded of my transparent self when I have practiced pure love and forgiveness. It is then that I feel light again, as if able to fly…then that I feel anything is possible, that nothing can stop me…penetrate me…a sense of invincibility…transparency. Sounds superhuman. Yes, that is my true nature. In one dimension or another, perhaps it is a form of flight, of floating, that much talked about, yet misunderstood “out of body” experience. What does that really mean, out of body? It’s the flight of spirit and witnessing it. Could it be like seeing God? What a feat! The spirit is formless, therefore non-conforming; it’s capable of going anywhere. Like vapor, like God. Our goal is to be like God, no? Uh oh, the conservative voices in my head are warning me about that sort of phrasing. Sounds blasphemous. Well, somewhere tucked away in this brain gem of mine, certain messages I heard growing up are starting to creep to the surface and make sense. Like the scripture I once heard that said God made man in his own image. What does that mean? It’s not for me to say, but I have faith in knowing that it’s a matter of linguistics and everything is open to one’s own interpretation. Back to being transparent- its original Latin translation keeps things simple- to show oneself. I see this word in a whole new light today. It’s about spirit…mine and yours. It’s about freedom, courage, liberty, to simply be as we were meant to be, how we were all born to be- vulnerable…open…unknowing…flexible…superfluous…enthusiastic…in spirit…completely transparent.


Embrace Your Inner Girl

Source: Uploaded by user via Kaylan on Pinterest

I’m capable of telling it like it is and capsizing boats that merit sinking, but I haven’t always gone “there” for fear of how I might be perceived or no longer received. GASP. An image-conscious, convivial woman?

I wish I could say it isn’t so, but it’s one of the biggest challenges for women (raising my hand) to overcome before reaching

The convivial promise land of “This is who I am, this is how I live…take it or leave it.”

Thankfully, we have a TED talk like the one given by Eve Ensler, creator of The Vagina Monologues (pictured above) to remind women how important it is to (more…)


Take time to reach God, reach creation, reach you.

(God. Creation. You.)


Discover Your Style and Make a Statement

I’m a faithful supporter of Danielle LaPorte’s site called White Hot Truth and am grateful for the moment in time we shared at her exclusive Austin, Texas Fire Starter Session in September 2009. Her energy was radiant, sexy, alluring, enlightening-my kind of company. She co-authored the book Style Statement and so I got a copy to appease my curiosity and potentially discover more about myself and what I wanted to say to the world. After some serious fun scribbling down and analyzing all the little idiosyncrasies that make up who I am, I discovered (well, already knew but wanted the confirmation) that my style statement is:
Genuine / Sensual. Ultimately, I have the final say about who I am and this book’s conclusions about me are not the end all, but I’d still like to recommend the experience of getting to know oneself better via the Style Statement book. If you’re interested in causing the gems that make up your mind, body and soul to surface and reveal themselves, grab a copy of the book and get started answering some pretty intimate and intriguing questions about yourself. I’ll post my personal notes and insights gathered from this fun experience at a later time.

Learn more about finding your Style Statement here.


Stop Being A Baby

“Stop being a baby!” We’re all very familiar and personally acquainted with that message. We’ve heard it as a baby from our parents because they wanted us to “act right” versus “act out.” And we continue to tell ourselves the same thing as adults when things don’t go our way. But at what point in our lives do we ever stop being a baby? NEVER. We will always have our moments where we need to whine, vent, cry, let it out, act out…so here’s your reminder, because you know you need it:

BE A DAMN BABY.Don’t be afraid to act out your true emotions. Let yourself be a baby. And THEN, just as babies do, GET OVER IT. Move on. Find a new distraction. Find a new task. Find a new pleasure. Have some new fun. Find your happiness again. BE A BABY.

Page 4 of 512345