Goals

A SacredSexyConvivial Challenge

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Last week, I had yet another amazing coaching session with Lisa Carmen of www.sacredsexyu.com. I’m already two months into coaching with the sexy femme fatale and I can definitely feel the changes happening within and around me. (Note: That means my heart is leading me in everything I am doing.)

In our last session, Lisa asked me to join her in a 31 Day Blog Challenge to post sacred sexy and convivial brain gems on our sites every day. I agreed to the challenge! Let me tell you, posting every day is a definite challenge to this mom of two boys, but it boils down to managing my time and being disciplined. Oh and minimizing distractions! Yeah, that’s huge. I work at it every day ya’ll. (Channeling Paula Deen here…)

I’ve been feeling under the weather for the past few days, so Lisa’s got the lead on posts! She’s already written such posts about Extreme Irregularity (wink wink), Coming A Long Way,, and “Backing Away from Backing Away” while I’ve managed to share a precious precious photo of a sculpture by Constantine Brancusi called “The Kiss”! Woo! You loved it, right? Okay! So the game is on and I am signing off now to get more written.

I promise to give my best effort and share lots of juicy knowledge and info with you, so be sure to sign up for to my RSS feed to stay on the sidelines and cheer me on with your comments! You can also love me long time and show your support for me on facebookand twitter!

Cheers to what’s ahead!

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The Definitive Regal Chic Brunch

Recently, I was inspired to put on the ritz in the form of a Regal Chic brunch for my girlfriends. There was no exceptional reason for the occasion other than my desire to spoil the women in my life and give them an experience they wouldn’t forget. How many women want to be spoiled? Raising my hand! But, how often do women spoil each other? It’s all about letting love get the best of us and spreading the joy. I gave my friends one month’s notice to mark their calendars for the event; told them to save the date and gave no inkling of what to expect. Little by little, a vision for the event began to reveal itself to me and with each new inspiring thought, I took to the stores and prepared for the big day. Initially, it was suppose to be a convivial day spent with just my friends, but then the whole life coaching with Lisa Carmen came about, and I began to think about challenging myself in ways I hadn’t before, so I chose to treat the brunch as a mini-workshop. It was an opportunity to take my efforts to empower and inspire women offline and stand before them in person. I was nervous about what I would do, what I would say, how the whole presentation aspect of the event would flow, but I decided to take the risk, to face any fears that might surface and put myself out there in a new way. It was time to take the stage.

When the day came and all was set to go, I felt my power coming through for me like a dear friend. I was no longer worried about what could go wrong or what I could miss saying to get my desired message across, and I especially wasn’t listening to the voice within saying, Who do you think you are doing this…What gives you the right to stand before a group of women and want to empower them…You don’t have anything valid to say…blah blah blah. I decided to let my heart lead the way and surrendered my desire for complete control. What a relief it was to be a follower! I felt such confidence as everything slowly came together. My guests began to show up and wanted to offer a helping hand, but I smiled and said, “I’ve got it covered. Just enjoy yourself today.” It felt wonderful to serve others, to offer all the love in me without any conditions, any expectations of getting payback.

When all was said and done, the event was a hit! I allowed the weight of the world to fall off my shoulders, thus creating a similar atmosphere for the women in my company. We had entered into a Convivial Society and anything was possible. I saw joy, expressions of pure elation, witnessed the little girl in every woman playing and giggling as they participated in the meal and activities. I felt light on my feet, formless, as if only my spirit walked around overseeing the event. I believe that’s what truly happened. My mother was my right-hand woman in bringing it all to fruition and I couldn’t have thought of anyone better to choose as my partner. By taking on the challenge to stand before friends as The Convivial Woman, I had stepped into a new realm. I had taken the idea of a Convivial Society and turned it into a real place, a real moment, for real women. I can only move forward from this point on and the ideas for more events are making their way to the forefront of my mind’s eye. Creation…it’s quite the beauty to experience. Fear or no fear, I’m wide awake and behind this wheel now…there’s no turning back.

Feast your eyes on the brunch pictures by clicking directly on the album below.

The Definitive Regal Chic Brunch

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Already In Your Proper Place

I had a meeting of the minds that caused a stir in my soul and the thoughts and realizations I took home have me brewing with possibility and wonder.
I met with Lisa Carmen- Life Coach, Burlesque dancer and choreographer for Dallas-based group Les Femmes Aplomb as well as creator of the site SacredSexyU. Need help getting more in touch or reconnecting all over again with your sensual side? Learn more about her program here! Lisa and I have been soul friend’s long before we met, so when it came time to mix the physical with our mental as was done over mojitos and micheladas, it got emotional. Alcohol was not a factor! There was a lot of smiling, giggling, and convivial mingling just as women do best, but what really went down was the experience of a full circle effect for me, the beauty of synchronicity, two apparent strangers going beyond the surface, and Lisa and I bowing to the universe for conspiring in favor of our new friendship. Meeting Lisa was like reuniting with a long lost love. I was thrilled to be in her presence and humbled to know she was just as excited to be in mine. I felt honored to receive her love and challenged by her adoration, because it holds me accountable to my heart’s desire and calls me out and onto the stage I’ve created for myself. Being the star of the show is not a role for which I ever auditioned…until now. When there is potential for me to play the leading lady, (read: woman in charge, as we all want to be!) I swear the butterflies are on me like bees to honey, fluttering about my stomach. Just the idea of debuting Convivial Society rocked my nervous system! I mean, how do you take something so private, like my writing, my art, something so intimate, spiritual and close to me, and make it public? You just do, because you know that it has to be shared for the world to benefit.

As an introvert, I have good reason to shy away from the limelight, to avoid the big crowds, but in meeting with Lisa, I realized that the light’s gotta shine on me at some point. The stage awaits. It’s simply a matter of when I’m willing (or pushed) to step forward and shine. Being the observer, the behind the scenes gal and feeling most fulfilled with one-on-one interactions has been the norm for me, yet my vision for Convivial Society is going to require me to come out from behind the turquoise curtain to take an occasional bow, cause some laughter, shed some tears, receive applause, glimpse a few yawns, hear potential boos and face numerous critics. It’s going to force me to stand firm in who I am and cause me to move forward anyway, because if I want to make any desire a reality, I have to accept the natural fear that comes with new endeavors and say, Fuck it. I lose nothing and gain everything. My life and the lives of those affected are richer for it.

Having great power is the reality of our existence, yet reality can be intimidating and scary. There’s always going to be doubt lurking in the background, trying to convince me that I don’t know what I’m doing, I don’t know who I am or what I truly want, perhaps even that I don’t fully believe in myself. This is where my tribe enters the scene to help me combat the mind and push forward with the heart. Instead of trying to become, I am trying to be…just be and by trusting, I learn more about my own power- what it feels like, looks like, sounds like, and oh what a beauty she is! The company I keep will test my commitment to further grow in my power and exercise it. The people we attract into our personal hemisphere are there to offer us what we need, especially when we aren’t aware of how much we need it. They should be someone we can open up to so that our vulnerable skin can be fully revealed and no room is left for judgment or disappointment. As a High Priestess once said, people operating from their true strengths are generous as hell with their gifts and encourage you to operate just the same. You’ll have no other option but to be real, honest, and on your game, shining through as you do you. Take me by the hand…yes, we all want to be led, but there comes a point when it is time to lead. Not sure how to go about it? Seek out your mentors, call on those friends who share the same vibration, and be willing to explore the questions that will cause you to sweat out your insecurities, render you completely vulnerable. I am better for my recent meeting with the Sacred Sexy Lisa and look forward to more with her and others in my convivial circle for now I know such people cross my path to reassure me that I am exactly where I need to be, doing what I am meant to do, already in my proper place.

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21.5.800: An Experience For Writers Who Want to Move

Thanks to Bindu Wiles, my newest challenge and personal commitment began on June 8th. For 21 days, I’ll be in spirit with Bindu and numerous other well-intentioned people from around the world doing 5 days of yoga a week and 800 words of writing per day. Along with the goal to condition my body and mind, I’ll use this project as another opportunity to share how it serves me spiritually. Namaste!

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Time to be found

We have choices on how to spend our time every day. We can choose to get bogged down with to-do lists and errands that don’t matter, get sucked into myriad newsfeeds and headlines of the day, answer and return every phone call, every email, or we can choose to stop and get lost in the hopes of finding ourselves. Getting lost opens up space in your mind and helps you find calm in the midst of chaos (read: peace). It quiets the noise, clears confusion, decreases fear, anxiety, depression, anger, what say you have you. Where there is space, there is flow and there lies the key to happiness. In my book, getting lost is synonymous with getting to know…you, that is. It’s returning to innocence, making a comeback, or perhaps, finding out for the first time that you are your first love and always the best company to keep. What you offer yourself, you offer the world.

Every act is a creative one. Time…it does the spirit good. Creating the space and time to nourish the woman in you is crucial and a way to practice self-love. Immersing ourselves in the activities we once were and are still attracted to is therapeutic and spiritually soothing. Not putting yourself first sacrifices your well-being and causes you to end up…(fill in your own consequence). For this reason, I took myself out of the virtual mix for one week and headed for my own private Idaho to concentrate on reading. I declared myself on a Convivial Reading Sabbatical, went AWOL on Facebook and Twitter, forbid myself any virtual communication, and didn’t think about writing. It felt great to not be connected to anything or anyone other than myself. This was my personal attempt to do that which can be so hard to do nowadays- be truly present and focused.

Throughout the week, I mostly read Danielle LaPorte’s newest piece of lit candy, The Firestarter Sessions which caused me to take a stroll through my mind’s labyrinth and stop to smell a few roses growing in the garden of my ever blossoming soul. I got some great business advice, gained new knowledge, met fascinating people, and enjoyed the expansion and transition from one aha moment to another. A few more convivial moments:

:: Discovering Imogen Heap as my new girl crush. Love her hair and genius for making music. No really, she makes every sound.

:: Enjoying the sweet rhythms that blasted into my ear via Bose headphones while my eyes sped across line after line of each article, blog post, and book chapter I devoured.

:: Admiring Beardey Man and his beat boxing example of how no talent is ever wasted. The man can make a girl laugh oh so hard!

:: Making the most of short periods of quiet time to embrace new ideas and think straight again. I’m a mother of two boys, ya know!

:: Keeping a solid commitment to myself because like writing, wearing black velvet blazers in the eighth grade, carrying the same bookbag all four years of high school, and serving as the primary caretaker for my children…it was my choice to do so.

So, there you have it- when a convivial woman is brave enough to put herself first, its because she knows the guaranteed effect is positively contagious and beneficial to all those in her life. Give yourself the oxygen mask FIRST, then your loved ones, and be witness to the joy of living that follows.

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Say Yes To You

“If you say YES to yourself, if you let your imagination fly, if you open one stuck, fear-wharped door, other doors you never even noticed fly open, pushed by a spirit strong as a hurricane.”

-Beverly Donofrio, author of Riding in Cars with Boys

Say “Yes” to people and experiences that nourish your spirit; it’s mandatory, top priority. Me, myself, and I…take care of numero uno and the rest falls into place.

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Fail Fast. – Seth Godin

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Fifteen – The Age of Innocence

I happened to catch the song, Fifteen, by young artist Taylor Swift and am taken back to the time when I was that age. She sings about how at age fifteen, “this is right before you know who you’re gonna be,” how this is the time when you’re suppose to find out who you’re suppose to be.

When I hear that lyric, I am transported back to my younger self, a sophomore in high school, and walking home alone – as I usually preferred. The noise of the passing traffic, occasional birds chirping, and the myriad thoughts flowing through my mind were enough company. I was thinking about the word “vocation” and pondering what my own could be. Without much thought, the word “writer” came to mind. That was the first time I realized that I was a writer, that that was the form of self-expression that chose me. That idea of being a writer has taken on many forms since that moment in my life. Of course, I had been expressing myself through journals since age nine, and twenty years later, nothing has changed. I am grateful to know my vocation; how I choose to fulfill it in this life is ever-changing, always evolving, but as long as I share myself with the world in this way, then I know benefits are inevitable for me and whoever chooses to read my words.

Who were you at fifteen? What’s your vocation?

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Stop Waiting

Wishing is easy. Doing is harder. Different, better, more memorable experiences call for different, better, more memorable intentions, efforts and language.

Stop waiting for others to make YOUR move.

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You are a Story

…she is a story whether she wants to be or not.
Because she is a woman.
People watch women as if reading them.
They watch them more closely than they do men.
Because they are more interesting.
Women have been the subject of so much objectification because of their intrinsic mystery.

Some of the greatest figures of worship are female:
the virgin mary
mother nature
earth goddesses
madonna…

people study women the way the devout read books; not so much to learn material as to surrender to a word or phrase that captures ones attention. That is how others perceive women. And that is why non-verbal symbols become weapons.

A strength you don’t use turns destructive.

- The Princessa, Harriet Rubin

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Stealing Time

Before I became a mother, I still felt the need to be in many places and serve in many roles for many people, but one thing that I know I’ve always had a strong sense to do is to be there for myself, to make time for me, to love myself in such a way as to make time for my wants, my interests, my needs, etc. Fortunately, I learned at a young age that no one else would do it for me.

As a teenager, I began to travel independent of my parents and never felt homesick. I was on my own and loved the feeling of freedom. Not that my home life was so restrictive, but I just felt this need to be out in the world, running away with the caretaker man, what have you. I knew that when I became a wife, that sense of freedom would not change. My husband would respect my need for independence and space to pursue my interests. Life has certainly brought such a man into my life as well as such experiences. Before I became a mother, I knew that my time would become more important. My child would require my time and attention and I would certainly do my best to make the choices necessary to offer as much of it as possible. I think I have done a pretty good job up to this point and am confident I will only get better with more time and experience as a parent. But before my son came into my life, I told myself that my sense of freedom to be me, to continue learning more about myself and the world and my place in it would not stop just because I now had more responsibilities at home and with family. I would take the time needed for myself when the time came. Guess what? The time has come. I am a wife, a mother, and still an individual woman.

Steal some time away for yourself…there are wonders in the world ready to caress your soul. Being a thief isn’t bad, especially if it causes your heart to slow to a calm beat.

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